When you are preparing for a Patriots game and face the prospect of braving the less-than-ideal elements:

  • If you do not bring 14 layers of clothing, you will find that you need them. Desperately.
  • If you do bring 14 layers of clothing, you will find that you do not need them, because it’s a ridiculously gorgeous mid-November evening.
  • If you do not bring rain gear, you will be drenched by halftime.
  • If you do bring rain gear, you will not need it in the least.
  • If you are completely prepared and ready to cheer for your team in the your much-beloved regular seats in the upper reaches of Gillette Stadium, you may come across a dear friend named Dana who will give you a treat that two out of two football fans agree is “way better than a pony.”

The night was so delightfully blissful, the game so thrilling, that I can’t even be upset that the Jets came out on top.

OK, just a little. But holysmokesdidyouSEETHATCATCH?

Im sorry about those side of a barn jabs, Matt.

I'm sorry about those "side of a barn" jabs, Matt.

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